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DIRTY LAUNDRY

10.10.2017 by Pippa Goetz //

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Oh crud…. you are here and now I have to throw down some crazy random facts about myself to appease your curiosity…. that’s OK. Truthfully, it is currently Monday night as I sit down to write this. I suddenly realized yesterday that blog post day was fast approaching and I didn’t have anything on “paper”… Since I’m a fly by the seat of my pants kinda girl, I decided on digging up some fun facts to help you get to know me a little better. I mean that’s what friends do, right?

Trust me when I say that there is NO shortage of dirt… I know I’m not alone on this, (Ahem… you know who you are) we are all onions peeling back layers (and maybe hoping not to rot in a dark cabinet… or is that just the forgotten depths of MY pantry?) Anywho, you are here, and here you go my sweet inquiring minds… Shhh, we’ll keep these little tidbits our secret…

 

| I USED TO BE A CAT BURGLAR |

No, not really… at least not in this life. I DO however believe in past lives and am COMPLETELY convinced that I ran a highly successful burglary ring that specialized in pinching fine gems and masterpieces, sneaking into museums and castles then belaying out of windows in the dead of night, escaping highly technical security systems only to speed away via a snappy Porsche 356 – wearing a skin tight cat suit of course (Trust me, my rear view must have been FABULOUS back then) … where I would have put said Masterpieces in such a zippy car is another topic as,  I have no idea. But seriously… I have this crazy weird obsession that may be just my love of suspense movies with a touch of Kelly / Hepburn / Theron / Zeta-Jones infatuations thrown in but nonetheless… there is inescapably something way back there. The only problem is that realistically in my mind I dream of “To Catch a Thief”, “Thomas Crown Affair”, “How to Steal A Million” and “Ocean’s Eleven” (and Twelve-duh) the the actual situation was probably a bit more along the lines of “A Fish Called Wanda” or “Dirty Rotten Scoundrels”. Regardless, I think I need a code name. Hmmm…

| PHOBIA #45 |

No, I’m not really phobic (except for snakes and high heights) but I do get crazy creeped out about swimming in the open ocean. WHAT!? I know, I know … I sailed the world for 4 years and basically circumnavigated the globe (twice) but I just could never seem to get past the secrets of the deep. Maybe it was seeing the sharks feeding at the back of the boat in Vanuatu, or having an eel (too much like snakes) surprise me at the Bitter End. Just know that you will find me within 10 strokes of the boat happily waiting for a fluffy towel and a cocktail. I can be such a chicken. P.S… this pic is NOT me snorkeling… because duh, I don’t snorkel, and my A$$ looks nowhere as fab as this… AND I think that guy is in a Speedo, not sure, but if he is, I probably would’t know him.

| HIPPIE CHILD |

I was a uber Hippie in College. Yep… Dreadlocks down to my rear, VW bus driving (it was named ‘Aurora’), clothing making, pot dealing, Grateful Dead following kinda stinker that you can probably attribute every grey hair on my mother’s head to. I drew the line at wearing Patchouli (ewww) or bartering fatty burritos… Instead I peddled hand rolled Sushi and knew how to change my own spark plugs (if you have ever owned a VW you know that this is a highly valuable and oft utilized skill). And NO, you will never see a picture because let’s be real… there are some times of our lives that we are all very thankful for a lack of digital photography and social media. Whew.

| HAWAII FIVE OH-NO |

I have been to 49 of the 50 states and all inhabited territories. You can just chalk me up to being a road trip kinda girl (I get it from my mother). Here is the kicker, I am only missing Hawaii. Seriously, Pippa… HAWAII!? That’s like, the FIRST place on everyone’s to go-list… I mean above Guam (been there), and definitely above places like Branson, Missouri (done that, don’t ask). I’ll get there some day, and when I do trust me when I say that I will be ALL over the lava flows, coconut bras,  umbrella drinks and sandy toes. Sometimes it’s better to save the best for last. P.S… how cool is this hand lettered vintage map from Truly Yours Design Co.??

| CURLY HAIR DON’T CARE |

True confession… I have curly hair. WHAAAAAT!? You are saying to yourself? Yep… unless you catch me fresh out of the Witzend (or any) pool you will only ever see me with straight hair because, I hate it. Why? What’s wrong with curls you say!? NOTHING, As long as they are yours. The gist is this… I didn’t actually grow up with curly hair.. it was pin straight my whole life. And THEN (reference above dreadlock reference) I had to (wink wink) cut my hair very short after college. And those new tresses grew in CURLY! ARGH!!!!! This wouldn’t be such a bad thing, as a child I dreamed of having curly hair, so you would think that I would be happy to finally get my wish? Yeah, no. Give me Julia Roberts’ hair- awesome, Meg Ryan’s cute and oh so famous LOB? Sure. Heck, I would even try out Shakira’s mane. But mine is more like Kelly McGillis’ in Top Gun if Kelly McGillis was somewhere windy with 98% humidity, didn’t have her waves professionally tousled before each beachy hot stuff sex bomb scene and then wandered through an electromagnetic field. So take a good look friends. You probably won’t be seeing this kind of reveal too often from my camp.

So there you have it… you are no doubt mind blown and can’t imagine spending the last 3 minutes it took you to breeze through this post doing anything else, am I right? I bet you were hoping for tablescapes and recipes? Don’t worry, there will be plenty of those too.

For the record, it is a VERY weird exercise sitting down to jot down things that maybe even your close friends may not know. In truth it is actually pretty fun, and I highly recommend it. Because just when you think your life has become routine, it is good to take a quick look back and inside for the parts that make you unique.

Have a wonderful week my dear friends. Go forth and be YOU… a conglomeration of random facts and cool experiences.

XO,

Pippa

 

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